I stir-fried broccoli, spinach, and chickpeas in a little teriyaki sauce, a lot of soy sauce, garlic powder, ginger, and red pepper flakes then mixed it all together with whole wheat linguine. It came out very nicely, and I'm not hungry two hours later. Cooking life: check. Love life: not so check.
The move back to New York has been an interesting transition. The best part, however, is my amazing job. I love my co-workers, I love my clients, I love the atmosphere. I love that I have my own office with a door I can lock when I want to pick egg yolks out of hard-boiled eggs and dip the whites in salsa. I love all of that. But mostly I love how much purpose it gives me. I leave the office every day knowing that I'm making a difference and I've done my job well. Meanwhile I hoped and prayed and promised myself that this satisfaction would be enough to keep me from going apeshit on OkCupid.
No success there. Have you any idea how easy it is to rate people on the OkC iphone app? Impossibly easy. I'm playing Quickmatch between clients. I'm giving four stars to people who previously would have made me shudder. I ask myself every day--is it worth it? Is this worth my time and energy? Is any man in this entire world worth ANY time or energy? I'm close to giving up. At least giving up on-line dating. But my co-worker met her fiance on OkCupid! And so did my friend's mom! And my cousin! Can't argue with those odds, am I right?
I'll keep considering it. I'll keep looking forward to seeing Evan. I'll keep dreaming of flying to Daniel in France. I'll keep bobbing and weaving through the occasional encounter with various and sundry lovers (each with their own unique deficit regarding physical and/or emotional intimacy.) Also, did I mention I'm moving to Brooklyn? I hear all the hot guys are in Brooklyn...
