Relationship vs. Hummus

Right. So remember when I said that with Evan I get to avoid sending passive aggressive text messages, avoid worrying that he's not going to call, avoid being all around bat-shit crazy? Wrong.

I guess I forgot that it's almost as easy (easier?) to be crazy in a relationship than outside of one. I routinely accuse Evan of not being "lovey" enough. I accost him when he sounds anything less than THRILLED to receive my call. "What's wrong?! Did something happen at work?! Are you in a bad mood? Did I do something? ARE WE BREAKING UP?!" It is a mystery that this man does not pull the plug immediately.

Unfortunately, the plug is being pulled by organic forces. In two weeks I'll leave my cushy New York life for (possibly also cushy) five months in Tel Aviv. At the beginning of the summer, the prospect of eating hummus all day and dancing to techno all night was the only thing getting me through each day. Now, instead of dreaming about Mediterranean men covered in olive oil (I mean, suntan lotion...) I'm dreaming about the emoticons in Evan's text messages. I'm not looking forward to spending five months apart from him, but I'm trying to keep an open mind about this incredible adventure. Jury is still out on our status while I'm abroad. I think Evan and I both know it's a mistake to stay exclusive. What can I do? The men in Israel might taste like tahini!

As much as I'm going to miss Evan, I know I need this big change in my life. On Wednesday, I got an e-mail from SEAN and I RESPONDED! Sean, the devil. Me, the huge idiot/pushover/freak. Subject: r u in israel? Body: just wondering how it is. Oh really, Sean? I was wondering if you choked on some poisonous Bangladeshi delicacy and had to be hospitalized where you acquired a strange communicable disease which prevented your re-entry into the United States. But that's just me. I need these five months for some self-exploration. I need to explore what on EARTH would compel me to respond to Sean's e-mail. My response: No, I leave the 27th. That was my way of punishing him. Pathetic. I finally stopped responding after a few short exchanges, but I don't forgive myself for indulging him.

I've been so wrapped up with Evan and tying up loose ends in my New York life that cooking has taken a major back seat to, well, everything else. I've eaten a lot of soup, a lot of cauliflower, and a lot of eggs benedict (Evan and I really bond over brunch). This coming week won't bring any more cooking action than last week. I'm eating out every night until I leave the city. Gotta hit up all my favorite spots. Can I really survive five months without the Salmon-Tuna-Yellowtail special from Funayama? Only time will tell.